Things My Troll Taught Me

Everyone should have a troll to call their very own.  I've learned so many interesting things.

1. Hillary Clinton is the devil and drinks the blood of children.
2. The Children's Defense Fund is really just a front for Hillary Clinton's illegal fundraising
3. Jerry Wexler ate black people
4. Flowers were made by Exxon to give children cancer
5. The Sun is an angry, vengeful god.
6. Bill Clinton ordered the bombing of the Federal Building in Oklahoma City
7. Hillary Clinton is melting the glaciers with her mind
8. Chelsea Clinton is the anti-Christ
9. Bananas are nature's way of making you radioactive
10. Laughing is bad

I'll pass on more words of wisdom as I receive them.