It's the same in any lingo

בַּת-בָּבֶל, הַשְּׁדוּדָה: אַשְׁרֵי שֶׁיְשַׁלֶּם-לָךְ-- אֶת-גְּמוּלֵךְ, שֶׁגָּמַלְתּ לָנוּ
אַשְׁרֵי שֶׁיֹּאחֵז וְנִפֵּץ אֶת-עֹלָלַיִךְ-- אֶל-הַסָּלַע

How can one be compelled to accept slavery? I simply refuse to do the master's bidding. He may torture me, break my bones to atoms and even kill me. He will then have my dead body, not my obedience. Ultimately, therefore, it is I who am the victor and not he, for he has failed in getting me to do what he wanted done. ~ Mahatma Gandhi
If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am not for others, what am I? If not now, when? ~ Rav Hillel, Pirke Avot

This Red Sea Pedestrian Stands against Judeophobes

This Red Sea Pedestrian Stands against Judeophobes
Wear It With Pride

31 December 2008

Farewell 2008, Don't Let the Door Hit Your Ass on the Way Out (Turn It Up To Eleven)

As the year draws to a close, I will not wax nostalgic.  I'd rather forget most of the stream of bullshit that was 2008.  From the complete collapse of democracy in America, to the unbridled sexism and misogyny, and the latest round of stupid in the Middle East, I have very little use for most of it.  But it was all well worth the fight if I gained nothing more than a rather extended family across the country, and around the globe.  To all my brothers and sisters in arms with whom I fought this year; I look forward to renewing our struggle for equality and human freedom in the coming year.

For my readers, thank you for coming along.  When I said this bus was going to cross borders I had no idea what was lying in wait for us.  Now we face the ultimate border, the ugliest, most blistered conflict on our planet.  I have no faith that the current players will resolve it.  I do hope that a Department of State under Hillary Clinton sees it from a different angle.  One that puts the priority of the people on both sides of the fence before the rhetoric of the leaders.  This is the only path from which I see any hope of success.  They had their shot, and clearly they can't play like good boys and girls, and sure as hell don't know how to share.  

So tonight, on the turn of the year, I send out a message to the people who sleep under rockets, and the threat of violence.  Be you in Sderot, Be'er Sheva, or Gaza, Darfur, Mumbai, Karachi, or Kabul, Tibet, or Tel Aviv.  Our leaders are asshats.  Let's learn to get along in spite of them.  Our needs are all the same aren't they?  Freedom.  Peace.  Equality.  You are the people I pray for most.  

For all of us living in the shadows of rhetoric, malice, prejudice, shortsightedness, and stupidity...may this be the year we make ourselves seen, heard, touched and healed.

From you I get the story...

30 December 2008

Lions, Lambs, Shams, and Scams: Part II, The Propaganda Machine

This post is strictly about the Hamas/Palestinian Authority Propaganda Machine. Watch the videos, look at the images. This is how Israel and the Jews are presented to the Palestinian people, especially the children. How does this advance peace? Does this look like this is being generated by a political body what wants peace with Israel?

For the remainder of the series there will be a follow up post that will be propaganda by Jewish extremists. There is no Israeli government sponsored propaganda to present as an equivalency to what you will see from Palestinian TV. But there will be an examination of Israeli government censorship.

There will then be a post regarding human rights violations by both sides and the series will end with a post on cooperative grassroots efforts that may be the only hope in this entire affair.


In order to understand the reality of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, you have to be aware as to how the Palestinian Authority and Hamas present their enemy, and how they present the conflict to the world. As you will see, biased media outlets have no problem circulating false footage. The most aggregious incident of this was the Al-Dura incident in 2000 where France 2 knowingly issued a staged event as fact to media outlets from all over Europe. What follows are documentaries on the so-called Pallywood, and how Al-Dura was staged, as well as some selections from Palestinian television. The Al-Dura footage was used by Osama bin Laden, and by the men who beheaded Daniel Pearl. It was used to inflame hatred against Israel, and Jews, across the Arab world, in Europe, and the United States, by the same media outlets PUMA has accused of pro-Obama bias in 2008. This is not a new problem.

Read how American journalists, the same ones who shoved Pampers down our throats, used Al-Dura at the onset of the intifada in 2000. Media bias is not reserved simply for That One.

This is video recorded before a Hamas attack in 2004

More video can be found here.

Question: Is there hope for peace as long as these seeds are sewn?

Then of course there is Farfur.

Brigitte Gabriel, who grew up in Lebanon, gave this speech at the Palestine Solidarity Conference at Duke University in 2004.

Question: How do you reconcile these alternate realities?

This is all part of the web of a region and a conflict that most people do not understand. How much of what you saw did you, or do you believe?

What do you reject, and what do you accept?

If the future leaders of the Palestinian people are raised viewing these images, is there hope for peace? When the word "occupation" is used it is not a reference to Gaza and West Bank. It is in reference to all the land between the Mediterranean and the Jordan River.

As we will see in the next post in the series, there are elements among Israeli society that wish to claim the same.

Comments on this post are to deal with the material presented only: your reactions to images presented. This is not a thread to discuss who kicked who out of where, who massacred who, and who is guilty. Comments that are off topic, race baiting, propaganda spew, etc will be deleted.

28 December 2008

Lions, Lambs, Shams, and Scams: The Israeli/Palestinian Morass, An Introduction

At the outset I will say that this is a difficult subject to present, and is a touchy subject for many. I am not addressing all aspects in this post. I am simply setting the stage for a broader examination of the problem. Matters of history are complex, and not very well known by much of the public. A good primer for the setting of the stage that is this mess, one should read David Fromkin's A Peace to End All Peace. The Middle East is an international relations disaster that European powers are very much responsible for making. I hope to shed some light on the current situation. You will be asked to challenge your assumptions and move beyond bias, regardless of what side you think you are on. Peace and human rights must be the goal, and those rights are universal. They are not meant for Arabs or Jews. They are meant for both.


With the renewed violence in Gaza, initiated by increased Hamas rocket fire and shelling over recent weeks, I have been thinking about how to approach the issue of addressing this chronic problem. The biggest psychological barrier for people is realizing that while it is true that the Palestinian people are some of the most screwed people on earth, it is an uphill battle attempting to get people to realize that it is the Palestinian leadership that is very much responsible for the decline of the conditions in the territories since Oslo, and prior.

The Israeli government has allowed its own set of human rights violations in the territories which is not helping matters. One need only go to WITNESS to see video of Israeli soldiers using Arabs as human shields against rock throwers. Olive groves are torn up. Houses are bulldozed. The human rights violations by both sides is the subject of another post.

There is a tremendous sense of powerlessness that is felt by ordinary Palestinians. They are unwilling to turn to the Israelis as they are raised to hate them, don't trust them, or would risk being seen as collaborators, for which you will be openly executed in the streets. At the same time, they cannot turn to their so-called leaders as they force them to live life at gun point, embezzle the financial, and material aid they receive (Israel was the largest supplier of same until after 1993), and use their induced poverty as a propaganda weapon to raise more money from the international community; the PA received $7.5 billion in pledges last year from the international community. Has that money gone anywhere other than into the PA's pockets, used as bribes, kickbacks, etc? It was accepted that if Israel did not loosen travel restrictions the economy would continue to collapse, regardless of the aid. But could restrictions be lifted when Mahmoud Abbas was not disarming the Al Aqsa Martyrs, Islamic Jihad, the PFLP...? Michael Eisenstadt writes that the Palestinian Authority suffers from, "the four Fs": fawda (chaos),fitna (strife), falatan (lawlessness), and fassad (corruption)." If you look up the word "screwed" in the dictionary there would be a picture of Palestinians.

27 December 2008

Your Future White House Consiglieri Greg Craig: Long on Shadiness, Short on Ethics

Apart from conducting the Resident-Select's whitewash of his transition team's involvement with Blagogate, soon to be White House Council Greg Craig has been flying somewhat under the radar of late.  At the outset let me say that I'm sorry, but unless you're a singer, actor, or circus performer, having a first and last name that rhymes is definitely a strike against you in the game of life (having Bestor as a middle name must have made for a guaranteed pummeling on the playground of Phillips Exeter Academy, unless his parents were richer than the other kids).  Unfortunately for the American people, Greg Craig has a lot worse things going for him than a rhyming name.

Here's a quick refresher course on Greg Craig through the prism of the 2008 election cycle.  As some of you may remember, John Podesta recruited Greg Craig to head President Clinton's legal team during the impeachment hearings (as you all know now, it's far worse to lie about fellatio in the White House than say about...weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, which must be why Quadrophonic Speaker Pelosi didn't call for impeachment hearings).  Greg Craig was buds with Bill and Hillary back in Yale Law School.  He was also one of the first of friends to throw Hillary under the bus, in 2007.  First question I'd like to ask Greg Craig would be, "So who tipped you off that the primaries were going to be rigged, Coward Dean or Naughty Nazi Nancy?"

So let's assume that Greg Craig knew the fix was in.  What else has Greg Craig had his grubby little hands in while mucking about with the rich and powerful?  

Let's's a wholesome fellow...Pedro Miguel Gonzalez Pinzon.  Cool name eh?  He is a Panamanian legislator who was wanted in the 1992 murder of a U.S. soldier, Zak Hernandez Laporte.  Awesome.  He was acquitted of that murder, but is still under indictment in the U.S.  Some of you might remember the subsequently underreported story of the conflict of interest faced by Greg Craig during the election.  

Seems that Mr. Pinzon was elected President of the Panamanian legislature in 2007.  Many of our upstanding and ethical legislators, who would never consider giving themselves a raise while bilking us out of billions of dollars for their wealthy Wall Street benefactors, have very righteously lifted their support for the Panama/US Free Trade Agreement or PUFTA as long as Pinzon is playing a part in the negotiations.  And guess who was among them?  Why it's our own Teleprompter Jesus, Barry Soetoro.  Because he is a pillar of morality, Pampers had also refused to move on a vote regarding the agreement.  Thank goodness we have such virtuous legislators showing the way to Utopia.

During the election his Barryness said he would not vote for the agreement while the issue of the Pinzon case remained unresolved.  He has since been quoted by AFP as saying that the success of American business depends on, "strong, robust trade, and open doors for American products."  Thankfully, the Resident-select also assured us that any trade agreements he signs will have, "the interests of our whole nation and our workers at heart."  Wow, I feel much better now.  I guess he plans on paving the road to hell with good intentions.  Great.  I think we ought to just assume that the agreement will be a done deal and we'll all get screwed.  That way no one will feel surprised when it happens.

For his part in the affair, Greg Craig found himself in quite a conflict of interest pickle, working as a foreign policy advisor for Pampers, and legal council to Pinzon.  Fortunately he and Pampers worked out a transparent, and morally sound solution to the problem.  Greg Craig, according to Panama News Briefs, simply told everyone, "The campaign knows of my involvement and I have removed myself from participation in discussions with the candidate or his advisers on relations between the United States and Panama."  Another political ethics disaster narrowly averted.

But the Panama Pajama Game is only one of a slew of shadeofgreynesses for Greg Craig and Latin America.

Though the Council on Hemispheric Affairs reports that he had an "open door" for victims of human rights abuses while working for Ted Kennedy, Greg Craig apparently ran afoul of the Bolivians when he represented former Bolivian President Gonzálo Sánchez de Lozada and former Minister of Defense Carlos Sánchez Berzaín.

Sánchez Berzaín and Sánchez de Lozada have been indicted in the United States for their being involved in the killing of 67 protestors in El Alto, Bolivia during the fall of 2003.  Apparently, then-president Sánchez de Lozada ordered troops into El Alto and Sánchez Berzaín gave them approval to open fire on unarmed civilians.  Whoops!

According to CoHA:
Human rights advocates believe that Craig’s continued representation of Sánchez de Lozada and Sánchez Berzaín demonstrates his readiness to defend the interests of the rich and famous against the poor (emphasis added by me).  Admittedly, such charges complicate his reputation in Latin America, and for some bring into question his true commitment to regional solidarity.
Readiness to defend the rich and famous against the poor?  Gosh, that sounds like someone who would be standing up for someone like say, Ron Blagojevich, not someone helping bring hope and change to Washington.

And let us not forget how Greg Craig spun like a dreidle on speed in the wake of the Flip Flop Waffle a la Pampers this past summer, when the Resident-Select got whiplash while swinging from filibustering FISA to voting for it.  In what could only be described as massive rationalization of garbage, Greg Craig said that Pampers felt, "it was better to get a compromise than letting the law expire."

That's right, when faced with defending our right to privacy and our Fourth Amendment rights, Greg Craig told America that it was better for his boss to compromise, and let the telecom companies off the hook for helping Resident Bush tap our phones without warrants.  You don't suppose that had anything to do with the fact that Pampers took money from California lobbyists for AT&T, or that AT&T was the principle corporate sponsor of the Democratic National Convention on Mt. Olympus do you?  Naaaaah.  That's just crazy talk.

This is really just scratching the surface of the moral ambiguity that is Greg Craig.  Perhaps he is perfect for Pampers.  Not so great though for those who were expecting hope and change.  Oh well, I'm sure they'll find some morally ambiguous way to justify the ethical circus that the media will refer to as the Obama administration.

26 December 2008

Happy Frickin' Chanukah

Time for a Chanukah rant.  First, let's set the record straight.  The OMV readership is a pretty sophisticated bunch; intelligent, well read, great taste in music, politically active, with a penchant for jokes involving poo poos and wee kind of people.  Most of you will already know this, but for those who stumbleupon this blog, here's a note:  Chanukah is not the Jewish Christmas.  It has nothing to do with Christmas at, not even remotely.

Chanukah is one of those hybrid holidays.  It is a celebration of Jewish nationalism; celebrating the Hasmonean defeat of King Antiochus and his legion of pig eaters who banned the study of Talmud, tortured, raped and murdered Jews, and defiled the Temple in Jerusalem with pigs and idols.  But Chanukah is not simply another marking of a moment where outnumbered and outarmed Jews kicked goyishe ass.  

The word chanukah means "re-dedication."  It is a reference to the retaking and cleansing of the Temple.  This is where the miracle of the oil comes in.  The menorah (the seven branched candelabra described in the Torah) needed to be rekindled.  Olive oil, inspected by a priest, was used.  There was only one cask of oil still bearing an intact priestly seal, the only way to verify that it had not been contaminated by goyishe cooties, which we all know contain lard based nucleotides.  This amount of oil should only have lasted one day (I have always wondered whether this is because the casks were so small, or because the menorah's system was inefficient...when Pampers assumes his messianic mantle and the Temple is rebuilt I hope that one of his first decisions is to make the menorah more fuel efficient).  Instead, the oil lasted for eight days, long enough for more oil to be produced (the production of oil for Temple use was banned under the occupation, as opposed to the banning of all olive oil production, which would be plain stupid as olive oil is the elixir of life), and inspected by a priest.

Ah, the priests.  Here's an oft looked aspect of the story.  The Maccabees, a family clan led by Mattathias, were Hasmonean.  They assumed control of the Temple Priesthood, as well as the throne of Judah, which apparently caused a great deal of controversy among Jews, and precipitated the conflict between the Pharisees and Sadducees, which eventually led to the Jewish joke that if you put two Jews together you'll have three's true...what, you never saw Fiddler on the Roof?  On the other hand.......

If the Hasmonean revolt has proven anything it's that you can't keep people perpetually separated from their freedom.  If you try you will get screwed one way or another.  Just ask Israelis and Palestinians.  There isn't anyone in Israel who truly thinks in their hearts that the status quo is good, or that the security barrier is good, or that Palestinians living in abject poverty is good, with the exception of those who are making a lot of money on all three ventures; on either side of the barrier.  

What?  That's right, there are Arabs in the territories making money, and lots of it, as a direct result of the current situation in the territories.  Here are the names of two of them: Saeb Erekat, and Mahmoud Abbas.  Erekat is a negotiator for the Palestinian Authority (you remember them, they used to be called the PLO, a terrorist organization dedicated to the destruction of Israel...whoops!  they still are...ho ho ho).  Mahmoud Abbas is the head of the PLO.  Both of these guys drive fancy foreign cars and wear Italian suits.  They are doing quite well for themselves while their so-called brethren live in abject poverty.  Why?  Because the PLO has the guns and they like it that way.

Historically, the single largest benefactor of the Palestinian people was the State of Israel.  Millions of dollars of medicine, food, materials, cash, and even weapons were sent to the Palestinian "leadership."  Finally the Israelis wised up when the guns got turned on them by the Palestinian "security forces."  Like here in the United States, and just about everywhere else in the world, the thugs in charge of the Palestinians have no vested interest in using this aid to help anyone.  Instead they drive the aforementioned cars, wear the aforementioned suits, and continue to fund the posh Parisian lifestyle of Yassir Arafat's widow, if she is in fact still alive.  Very telling isn't it that the wife of the so-called founding father of the Palestinian people doesn't even live on the same continent.  What was that, let them eat pita?

Now the Israelis aren't helping matters with their inconsistent policies, tearing down olive trees, soldiers violating international law by using Arabs as human shields against people throwing rocks at them, building more housing in disputed areas....but on the other hand, it's hard to get anywhere when the people you are supposed to be negotiating with don't recognize your right to exist and are still dedicated to your destruction.

What?  I thought Abbas was a moderate.  

Ha ha.  Sorry folks.  When you attend your annual events marking what you call "The Great Tragedy" aka Israeli Independence Day, you are not a moderate.  Fatah is just as dedicated to destroying Israel as Hamas.  What's the difference?  Hamas wants to establish a Muslim caliphate in Israel, while Fatah has no religious center other than let's keep taking all the money. 

I'm certainly not going to advocate putting pressure Israel to negotiate with parties that want to destroy her, which is the failure of the majority of leftist peaceniks.  They don't get that.  The solution to the crisis is not forcing Israel to allow the creation of a hostile state on indefensible borders, which is exactly what American leftists want.  The solution is a federation based on security, respect, and economic symbiosis.  This is not going to happen until the international community stops treating Abbas like he's some kind of diplomat or head of state.  He is a terrorist who wants to kill Jews and has shown nothing substantive to prove otherwise.  He has not disarmed the terrorist groups that he controls, nor has he taken any steps to legalize the Palestinian recognition of Israeli sovereignty.  

The international community, if they are so concerned about the suffering of the Palestinian people, which they should be, will move to completely isolate and dismantle Hamas and Fatah and cultivate leadership among the Palestinians that share the goals I stated above.  That is, if they want peace between the Arabs and Jews.  If they want Israel destroyed they will continue pushing the failed roadmap to crap, and dealing with the thugs who are responsible for the poverty and suffering of the Palestinian people.  With the billions upon billions of dollars that have been funneled into the hands of these gangsters by the Israelis, the UN, the World Bank, etc every Arab in the West Bank and Gaza should have a home, running water, electricity, a job, and access to healthcare.  There should be no suicide bombers, rockets, terrorists, etc.  What happened to all that money?  Hmm...maybe that's a task for Diamond Tiger.

So no, the solution is not more concessions from the Israelis, who get screwed every time they make them.  The solution is to get the gangsters out of power.  Who's got the spine to do that I wonder?  Surely not the Resident-Reject.  I'm thinking more along the lines of the lady in the pantsuit.

Senator Clinton, your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to lead the international effort to cultivate Palestinian leadership that will be based on peace with Israel, not predicated on her destruction (the sole modus operandi of the Palestinian body politic since its creation by Yassir Arafat), the economic and social well being of the Palestinians, and the establishment of an open federation that could possibly turn out to be the new economic engine of the region.  But somehow I don't think the Saudis, Syrians, and Iranians are going to like that.  I guess we could always fall back on the old stand by: blame the Jews.

Trying to force Israel to negotiate with the current leadership is only going to lead to more of the same, and the pawns in all this will continue to suffer.  And the torture and killing of Jews in Mumbai, a tiny and obscure population in a greater metropolitan area of 20 million, is further demonstration that a Jewish homeland is still a necessity.  But it seems that the world just takes it for granted that we get killed, and is okay with that.

So this Chanukah, let's dedicate ourselves to the notion that peace can only be achieved through sanity, and cannot be made with greedy megalomaniacs.  Sorry Pampers, you stay home and play with your Wii and let the lady handle this.  You're in way over you head.  I believe the Middle East is above your pay grade anyway.

And please, all those of you celebrating Christmas, tomorrow, stay home with your loved ones.  You don't want to go to the movies or eat Chinese food.  You should be at home in front of the fire, roasting chestnuts, making memories, and listening to Nat King Cole.  Leave the movies and Chinese food to us.  I will have a special Christmas eve post at midnight for those still chuggin' the egg nog, which I happen to like with rum and a little cinnamon and ginger.  Tasty!

51%: We're Putting Misogyny Out of Style

It has been my esteemed pleasure to have worked closely with Heidi Li Feldman on a variety of projects: The National Women's History Museum, Seneca 160, my field trip to the DNC in Denver, among others.  Heidi is launching a new initiative with a new purpose: 51%.  

Rather than go on foaming at the mouth about how essential I find this organization to be, especially in light of the ongoing misogyny being condoned by the Resident-Reject, most notably in the form of Jon Favreau, the misogynist Residential Mouthpiece in Chief, I'll let you read the statement from the organization's founder.  
Fifty-one percent of the general population is composed of women. 51 Percent will educate people about the relationship between proportional representation of women in the public spheres and the elimination of misogynistic conduct. Thus 51 Percent will have two overriding objectives:

1. To educate the public about the significance and advantages of proportional representation for women in all areas of civic life.

2. To examine and explain what misogyny is, particularly how its differs from sexism and why it deserves separate scrutiny especially in so far as it is among the causes and symptoms of a lack of proportional representation in every sector of public life.

To achieve its goals, 51 Percent will begin with its own website, planned to include space for a blog with news and brief views; in-depth essays by guest writers; an online exhibit of mysogynistic memorablia, the maintenance of a speakers' bureau to connect groups interested in learning about proportional representation for women in civic life with speakers knowledgeable in this area. Long range goals include a physical collection of misogynistic memorabilia put into context and which can serve as a traveling exhibition to schools, businesses, and other organizations interested in learning more about the history and effects of misogyny; the development of an extensive reference list; and a physical collection of books and journal articles relevant to the proportional representation of women and the problem of misogyny.

51 Percent is very much a grass roots effort and I expect its direction and efforts to respond to the feedback it gets from supporters and friends. It has already been the beneficiary of this process.
To help get the organization off the ground please consider donating by clicking on the 51% badge on the right hand side of the page.  You will be taken to the interim informational page for 51% and will find a Google donate button there.  I gave.  It was quick, and 100% painless, unlike misogyny, which is 100% painful.  

If the 2008 Presidential Election cycle taught us anything it's that the media will not tolerate racism.  The same cannot be said about misogyny, which the media, and the incoming Resident, not only tolerates, but perpetuates.  Obviously we have our work cut out for us.  So dig deep.  Even $0.51 will be accepted, and will help.

Thank you.

25 December 2008

The Canine Leisure Society (Wake Us in 2012)

As you know I have decided to run for President of the United States in 2012, because...what the hell?

You may also know that I am going to be advancing a platform based on the Bhutanese concept of Gross National Happiness and the Four Year Boxing Day where current elected officials will be spending four years doing your menial labor.

The central idea is that it's about time America embraced the concept of the Leisure Society. We've tried the New Society, the Dead Poets Society, High Society, and the Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things. The Leisure Society is an idea whose time has come.

Always on the cutting edge of social revolution, my dogs are taking the lead by advocating a life of more napping, playing, and letting humans continue to screw things up while they simply relax and enjoy life. The cats are right beside them, napping for freedom. Our animals teach us to love unconditionally. Now they desire to teach us to relax. The powerful are always going to be screwing things up for the rest of us. The animals say, as long as the bed is warm, there's food on the table (meaning the bills are paid), water, snacks, love, and a little exercise, and the freedom to bark and run unencumbered by fascist restrictive bullshit, the dingdongs running things can go screw themselves. I have to say that I agree with them. So word to wise Congress; don't do anything that's going to take away any of the things mentioned above. If you do it will be a shitstorm.

Look to the animals, they have the right idea. If you have an animal that lives the Canine Leisure Society lifestyle (any and all domestic animals are welcome) send us a photo, preferably of them napping or playing. We'll add them to the CLS member slideshow on this blog. Send your photos to:

The Canine Leisure Society: Deflating the egos of our leaders by flipping them the bird, and chillin'.

Christmas Must Be Tonight

For those of you who didn't beat up anyone to get the last Water-board Me Elmo, who are hunkered down with the people they love, and remembering the need for peace and joy, here's one for you. This is the Band performing my favorite Christmas song. It doesn't appear in its entirety, but the video says it all.

Happy Christmas.

22 December 2008


Music is one of my great loves.  Coming of age in the 80's I was cursed with hitting puberty at one of the worst musical eras in history.  Sure there were some exceptions: Elvis Costello and the Attractions, Talking Heads, The Clash, Neil Young (who rocks in every decade) The Police, U2, Joan Armatrading, Peter Gabriel...but for every one of them there were 10 Kajagoogoos.  Rock 'n' Roll was on life support.  Nirvana was the Great White Hope in the early 90's so naturally Kurt Cobain killed himself just as the band was really getting interesting.  We're in another lull now.  There just isn't anyone out there who is making much in the way of music that's really important at the moment, with a couple exceptions. Gnarles Barkley is one.  What's not to like?  But Gogol Bordello takes the cake.  This is rebel music.  If you don't own Underdog World Strike you really owe it to yourself to get a copy, and more of their stuff.  Get familiar with them because I'm booking them to play my inaugural ball.

How about this as an opener?  It's good advice for the now as well.

Don't believe them for a moment
For a second, do not believe, my friend
When you are down, them are not coming
With a helping hand
Of course there is no us and them
But them they do not think the same
It's them who do not think
They never step on spiritual path
They paint their faces so differently from ours
And if you listen closely
That war it never stops
Be them new Romans
Don't envy them my friend
Be their lives longer
Their longer lives are spent
Without a love or faithful friend
All those things they have to rent
But we who see our destiny
In sound of this same old punk song
Let rest originality for sake of passing it around
Illuminating realization number one:
You are the only light there is
For yourself my friend
There'll be no saviors any soon coming down
And anyway illuminations
Never come from the crowned
Illuminating realization number one:
You are the only light there is
For yourself my friend

That's it! I'm Running for President

I've finally had it.  Go read the latest at Logistics Monster if you feel like getting more pissed off than you already are.

I'm running for President.  I figure if Shrub and Pampers can get elected on "Change" I can get elected on a platform of Gross National Happiness.  My presidency will be a period where we're going to do what makes us happy.  We'll start by having a four year Boxing Day where the bosses work for us.  You might see Nancy Pelosi scrubbing toilets at the local rescue mission, or Chuck Schumer mucking the elephant pen at the Bronx Zoo.  Dick Cheney could be sucking the bodily waste from port-a-johns at the Meadowlands.  Who knows (nothing says "screw you ass" more than making the powerful deal with bowel movements)?

You wanna work 4 days a week but get paid for 5 days of work?  You got it.  How will we pay for it?  Well, I figure that all the financial institutions that have borrowed money from us ought to be paying us back, at an unusually high interest rate.  I mean, don't people with shit for credit have to pay the the most usurious interest rates?  Well, even I have better credit than the outfits that getting our tax dollars hand over fist.

What else can you expect from President Shtuey?  We're going to have a good time.  Think of it as that moment you get home from work, finally get to kick back, maybe have a cold beer, and just exhale...for four years.  

I foresee members of the current Congress in stocks on the National Mall being pelted with rotten produce six hours a day by passing citizens.  I see your legislators mowing your lawns, taking out your trash, scrubbing your toilets, mopping your floors, picking up the dog excrement while you and your canine friends stroll on without a care...and they will be paying your taxes.  I mean, they're just willy nilly taking our money and giving it to whoever the hell they want.  Screw those little punks.

How incredible would it be to be able to call up Chris Dodd in Connecticut from your house in Missouri and say, "Yo Chris, my dog's anal glands need to be expressed, get the hell out here you tool!"  Yeah, it'd be pretty fuckin' sweet.  

We will finally embrace the weird.  How's about this for a slogan?  Strange You Can Believe In.

Shtuey for President.  Let's live a little!

Hey, have you heard...?

Bird is the word!

Low brow is the new high brow.

21 December 2008


The NFL playoffs are upon us, and so are the holidays.  Chanukah starts tonight, so chag sameach to all my Red Sea Pedestrians out there.  Drink a gin and tonicah 'cause it's time to celebrate Chanukah.  I've already posted that song, so here's another classic.

Family Guy - Shipoopi - Funny bloopers are a click away

The Fox

Those of you who are regulars know that I have been reflecting on Le Petit Prince.  I revisit it every few years.  It feels different each time I read it...or I should say, the truth harvest tells me something new.  This time around I am preoccupied with the fox.

He desperately wants to be tamed, to be connected to someone, to something.  When I was younger I thought this was upside down.  To be tamed was to be held down,  to be made to crawl.  But the fox sees it from quite a different angle, because what I didn't understand before I had a taste of real love, is what it means to find something to be truly unique, something that gets inside of you, creates and fills a space, and never leaves you, in spite of the inevitable vicissitudes.

I see the love story more clearly now than in years past, or perhaps I am simply in greater need of  it.  So much damage has been done to so many people this year.  You really need to put your ear to the rail and listen.  Retirees have lost their savings, and many don't have a time frame that allows them to sit back and wait for recovery of their ravaged pension and retirement funds.  

LGBTs who didn't realize it before are beginning to understand that they cannot wait for a champion to stand for them.  I know many who saw this coming, and their voices fell on a lot of deaf ears in their community.

I am surrounded by furious women.  Do not misread me when I say they are pissed.  They are really really pissed.  If you go to the dictionary and look up the word pissed they will be there.  We all watched what happened to Senator Clinton this past year.  Yes, she was denied the nomination, and thus the Presidency because the powers that be in the Democrat Party wanted The Waffle King, but that's not the heart of the matter.  Yes, she was made a target of sexist and genuinely misogynistic attacks, the most agregious of which came from "news" broadcasters, but this isn't the source of the fire, nor is it the fact that it was done again to Governor Palin (in spades). 

No, it's the fact that when they spoke up and said, "What the fuck is this bullshit," the powers that be, the media, and the supporters of the Waffle Maker, told them to shut the fuck up, sit the fuck down, oh and by the way, spread 'em and when we're done with you bake us a fucking cake!"  We heard this most recently from James Carville who basically told women that they were making a mouse out of a molehill.

Well guess what Jimmy boy?  A colleague of mine is watching over one of her two daughters who is fighting to regain her life, with half her brain, thanks to her ex brother-in-law, because the system that was supposed to be protecting her and her family, a system largely run and controlled by men (though there are apparently women in high places that have blood on their hands over this), failed them utterly.  

I won't bother to ask how many women will have to be victims of domestic violence before the nation and the world stands up and says, "enough," because the threshold for that was crossed at 1.  Millions of women have died worldwide, but still it goes on.

BJ Kling has someone unique in all the world fighting for her life.  People need to start looking within themselves and figuring out what's really important.  The pissed off women around me?  They know what's important and they are getting ready to fight to defend it, and take what is theirs by right.

There's a not so silent genocide happening around this world.  The women around me, and the men who support them want it stopped.

Why is it so much easier to sever a bond than forge one?  Why is it that what should be valued most is so easily discarded or ignored?  What is more precious than a living soul?  What should be treasured more?  Gold?  Silver?  Power?  It's hard to run with the weight gold anyway.  Why is it that the voice of a mother, a daughter, a sister, wife, a friend isn't coveted more than those things?  You have no idea what you are missing, and what is being wasted behind closed doors, and in out of sight out of mind hospital rooms.

From the fox the little prince learns the value of the heart, the value of connecting with something or someone, and what is really important.  He learns that though there may be millions upon millions of roses in the universe, his is unique.
"But in herself alone she is more important than all the hundreds of you other roses: because it is she that I have watered; because it is she that I have put under the glass globe; because it is she that I have sheltered behind the screen; because it is for her that I have killed the caterpillars (except the two or three that we saved to become butterflies); because it is she that I have listened to, when she grumbled, or boasted, or even sometimes when she said nothing. Because she is my rose."
A rose of Betty Jean Kling's is fighting for her life.  Take a moment to send your mind.

This message from a friend of BJ was forwarded to me earlier today:

Louisa had another surgery last night, before she went into the O R they told BJ Lou's brain function was 4 out of 15, and she was on total life support. BJ thought she had lost her little girl. She came through surgery, but called the family in this morning, Lou's blood pressure had dropped to 45, and they were talking to them about removing life support.
When they reached the hospital, however, Lou started rallying around, and actually started breathing somewhat on her own. They are giving them hope again, but are telling them the 3rd day after this surgery will be the test.
BJ asked about the brain function, and they were told there is a chance the undamaged side of her brain could compensate for some of the loss .
The doctor is suprised and said she has rarely seen anything like this. Louisa is really fighting to hold on.
BJ asked me to pass the word on and to thank everyone for their support, and to request everyone to continue to pray for Louisa.

When the little prince comes to say good-bye, the fox shares his secret with him:
"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."
"What is essential is invisible to the eye," the little prince repeated, so that he would be sure to remember.
"It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important."
"It is the time I have wasted for my rose--" said the little prince, so that he would be sure to remember.
"Men have forgotten this truth," said the fox. "But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed. You are responsible for your rose..."
"I am responsible for my rose," the little prince repeated, so that he would be sure to remember.

You are responsible for that to which you are connected.  What are you going to do about it?

20 December 2008

Comments Open

I have taken the comments out of moderation.  I suspect that any Pamperbots out there would be too embarrassed to admit they voted for the Resident-Reject to come here and shoot their mouths off.  But if they are their comments will be removed and they will be humiliated.


And now, something desperately needed by everyone...even the wealthy apparently...something completely  After all, it's accountancy that makes the world go round.  "You can keep your Marxist way for it's only just a phase..."

Shut the Hell Up! (or Don't Say I Didn't Warn You)

 Pampers betrayed us waaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!  

Every damn day some new group of dimwits wakes up to find they were stupidly duped because they actually believed the Hope and Change machine.  

First it was the leftists when Pampers voted for FISA.  Then it was the Leftists when Pampers appointed the Clinton administration (in reality the only smart thing the clown has done).  Then it was the environmentalists who got screwed when Pampers named Ken Salazar to head the D.O.I.  Now it's the gays who were stupid enough to vote for Pampers expecting support when the douchebag dunces who coronated the braying ass said that the struggle for gay rights is not a civil rights issue (that's offensive to black people apparently, at least according to Donna Brazile and Leah Daughtry).  You idiots were not paying attention and now you're fucked.  If you think Rick Warren braying at the inauguration is the end, just you wait.  How a gay person could vote for Pampers is beyond me.  Oh wait, it's because you knee jerk vote for the Democrat.  Bet you don't make that same stupid mistake in four years...who am I kidding, you probably have your Pampers '12 shirts all starched and ready to go.  

You could have backed Hillary Clinton, who actually believes in equal protections for gays, but no, you went with the ass who has never done a damn thing for you.  High five dummies!

Don't blame me...I warned you idiots, all of you idiots, left, gay, straight, male, female, brown, red, yellow, and plaid, back in 2007.  Let's take a ride in the Wayback Machine to April of last year shall we?
I don't think I need to spend one minute discussing that you can't EVER trust a politician--not until you see the proof in the pudding. For those of you dyed in the wool party believers--pull your heads out of your asses. Your party doesn't give a crap whether you live or die; except that if you die you can't vote...but they won't send flowers either).  
Of course we had Pampers and ACORN to remind us that the dead CAN vote.

I'm getting really fucking tired of saying I told you so every five minutes.  You dummies bought into this guy.  You bought him, you own him, you made this bed.  Now we all have to pay for your stupidity for the next four years.  So shut the hell up with your whining you pukes.   This is your own damn fault.

Don't blame me, I voted for Hillary.  And I warned you.

18 December 2008

Pampers Poetry Bomb

I was listening to "All Things Reconsidered" on National Pampers Radio on my way home tonight.  They did a story about Elizabeth Alexander, personal friend of Pampers, and the poet he has chosen to write a tome for his coronation.  I should preface by saying that I have never read any of her work, but was suitably unimpressed by the selection she recited for the segment.  She spoke about what she feels is involved in rising to the task of writing for such an event:
"...I am the vessel for the poem.  It's not about the poet at that moment, it's about the poem. So the pressure — the challenge — is to write a poem that can serve … all of those expectant, gathered millions and to let the poem be what calms my nerves when I am up there. To let myself remember that I am there to deliver these words and these words have been commissioned to deliver a very, very amazing moment."
Yes, I too threw up a little in my mouth.

When the story was over I turned off the radio and thought what I would write for the occasion.  It's been a long time since I've written a poem.  Song lyrics, yes.  But a poem?  It had been years.  I gravitated to the cliche of being the vessel and began formulating verses in my head on the theme.  I give to you now my ode to the coronation of Pampers:

Big Bucket of Vomit

I have a great big empty bucket that I shall deliberately fill
Fifty state rapes and deflated dreams, 
a siphon of money into benefactors’ pockets…
Voices screaming, sheeple bleating, and cheaters cheating...
Bros beating hos and goodness knows
there’s plenty of room for their bleeding, copping, and feeling…
Ironed shirts, once respected writers, kids in blue tees
singing songs in phony New Age choirs 
for their grownups’ sense of contentment…
Brushed off shoulders and unholy rollers,
speaking in tongues to decide whose cause is civil right, 
and who is uncivilly wrong…
Statuary blue bears peering in at zombies staring through a plate glass fog,
inhaling just words while the pertinent laws are burned…
Snakes’ blood and parlor games,
for those who are willing to pay, 
and sell…
Dope and rage for those who now know 
there will be no change, 
just more of the more they stay the same…
A generation of burned bras passing torches that never went out,
smoldering quietly for a sum of years until 
NOW let them down…
Broad stripes and 48 bright stars, 
and the last gleam of twilight.

All into my bucket these will go,
and i will be the vessel for it all,
so when I see you pass you new boss same as the old boss
in your new clothes,
i can puke my salute to the latest false-god of Fraud.

And when at last i am emptied of every broken promise 
i will round up my young ones and teach them well.
For as surely as your mouth is the sluice for a flow of unending lies,
this will happen again if they do not learn 
to live with open eyes.

So, who are your favorite poets?  Mine are Dylan Thomas, Emily Dickinson, Robert Frost, and e.e. cummings.  And then of course there is Ewan McTeagle...

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! Domestic Violence Hits the Pumasphere with UPDATE

I have received word that Betty Jean's daughter Louisa has suffered a brain hemhorrage.  She asks for our prayers now.            רפואה   שלמה

For those of you who haven't heard, our Betty Jean Kling's daughter is in the hospital in critical condition after her being shot by her former brother-in-law, George Hartwig.  This is the most updated story I could find.

A series of PUMA actions are being put in place.  What we need today is calls and faxes to be sent to the office of the Judge who will be arraigning Hartwig.  He is to be arraigned at 1:30PM today before Judge Harry Carroll.

Judge Carroll can be reached at:
Fax: 201-752-4109

Please contact him and urge him to please take any action to prevent Hartwig from ending up back on the street.  This is a man with an extensive history of domestic violence.  He will commit more acts of violence if allowed to go free, and I do not doubt that Betty Jean and her family would be endangered by his release.

It is obvious from Hartwig's rap sheet that there was ample opportunity to stop this tragedy from taking place.  There were restraining orders, and a history of violence and criminal acts that somehow were ignored (I will reserve judgement on Bergen County judges, police, and sheriffs regarding their prioritization of cases of domestic violence until I have more facts on this case and others, but clearly parties involved dropped the ball on down the line on this clown for this to have taken place).  At this time we are not able to pinpoint where these breakdowns in the system took place.  We will be working with local law enforcement and domestic violence prevention groups to ascertain exactly where failures took place, who needs to be held accountable, and what steps must be taken to prevent this from happening to another innocent woman.

Violence committed against women by current and former domestic partners is widespread.  It's time that we put a stop to this once and for all.  

Here are the stats, as provided by

Estimates range from 960,000 incidents of violence against a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend per year 1 to three million women who are physically abused by their husband or boyfriend per year. 2 

• Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime. 3

 • Nearly one-third of American women (31 percent) report being physically or sexually abused by a husband or boyfriend at some point in their lives, according to a 1998 Commonwealth Fund survey. 4 

• Nearly 25 percent of American women report being raped and/or physically assaulted by a current or former spouse, cohabiting partner, or date at some time in their lifetime, according to the National Violence Against Women Survey, conducted from November 1995 to May 1996. 5 

• Thirty percent of Americans say they know a woman who has been physically abused by her husband or boyfriend in the past year. 6 

• In the year 2001, more than half a million American women (588,490 women) were victims of nonfatal violence committed by an intimate partner. 7 

• Intimate partner violence is primarily a crime against women. In 2001, women accounted for 85 percent of the victims of intimate partner violence (588,490 total) and men accounted for approximately 15 percent of the victims (103,220 total). 8 

• While women are less likely than men to be victims of violent crimes overall, women are five to eight times more likely than men to be victimized by an intimate partner. 9 

• In 2001, intimate partner violence made up 20 percent of violent crime against women. The same year, intimate partners committed three percent of all violent crime against men. 10 

• Women of all races are about equally vulnerable to violence by an intimate. 11

 • Male violence against women does much more damage than female violence against men; women are much more likely to be injured than men. 12 

• The most rapid growth in domestic relations caseloads is occurring in domestic violence filings. Between 1993 and 1995, 18 of 32 states with three year filing figures reported an increase of 20 percent or more. 13 

• Women are seven to 14 times more likely than men to report suffering severe physical assaults from an intimate partner. 14 

• The health-related costs of rape, physical assault, stalking, and homicide by intimate partners exceed five point eight billion dollars each year (CDC study).

 Domestic Homicides:

• On average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in this country every day. In 2000, 1,247 women were killed by an intimate partner. The same year, 440 men were killed by an intimate partner. 15 

• Women are much more likely than men to be killed by an intimate partner. In 2000, intimate partner homicides accounted for 33.5 percent of the murders of women and less than four percent of the murders of men. 16 

Health Issues:

• About half of all female victims of intimate violence report an injury of some type, and about 20 percent of them seek medical assistance. 17 

• Thirty-seven percent of women who sought treatment in emergency rooms for violence-related injuries in 1994 were injured by a current or former spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend. 18 

Domestic Violence and Youth:

• Approximately one in five female high school students reports being physically and/or sexually abused by a dating partner. 19 

• Eight percent of high school age girls said "yes" when asked if "a boyfriend or date has ever forced sex against your will." 20 

• Forty percent of girls age 14 to 17 report knowing someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend. 21 

• During the 1996-1997 school year, there were an estimated 4,000 incidents of rape or other types of sexual assault in public schools across the country. 22

 Domestic Violence and Children:

• In a national survey of more than 6,000 American families, 50 percent of the men who frequently assaulted their wives also frequently abused their children. 23 

• Slightly more than half of female victims of intimate violence live in households with children under age twelve. 24 

• Studies suggest that between three point three and ten million children witness some form ofdomestic violence annually. 25 


• Three in four women (76 percent) who reported they had been raped and/or physically assaulted since age 18 said that a current or former husband, cohabiting partner, or date committed the assault. 26

 • One in five (21 percent) women reported she had been raped or physically or sexually assaulted in her lifetime. 27

• Nearly one-fifth of women (18 percent) reported experiencing a completed or attempted rape at some time in their lives; one in 33 men (three percent) reported experiencing a completed or attempted rape at some time in their lives. 28 

• In 2000, 48 percent of the rapes/sexual assaults committed against people age twelve and over were reported to the police. 29 

• In 2001, 41,740 women were victims of rape/sexual assault committed by an intimate partner. 30 

• Rapes/sexual assaults committed by strangers are more likely to be reported to the police than rapes/sexual assaults committed by "non-strangers," including intimate partners, other relatives and friends or acquaintances. Between 1992 and 2000, 41 percent of the rapes/sexual assaults committed by strangers were reported to the police. During the same time period, 24 percent of the rapes/sexual assaults committed by an intimate were reported. 31 


• Seventy-eight percent of stalking victims are women. Women are significantly more likely than men (60 percent and 30 percent, respectively) to be stalked by intimate partners. 32 

• Eighty percent of women who are stalked by former husbands are physically assaulted by that partner and 30 percent are sexually assaulted by that partner. 33 

1 U.S. Department of Justice, Violence by Intimates: Analysis of Data on Crimes by Current or Former Spouses, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends, March 1998.
 2 The Commonwealth Fund, Health Concerns Across a Woman’s Lifespan: 1998 Survey of Women’s Health, May 1999. 
3 Heise, L., Ellsberg, M. and Gottemoeller, M. Ending Violence Against Women. Population Reports, Series L, No. 11., December 1999.
 4 The Commonwealth Fund, Health Concerns Across a Woman’s Lifespan: 1998 Survey of Women’s Health, May 1999.
 5 The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and The National Institute of Justice, Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence, July 2000. 
6 Lieberman Research Inc., Tracking Survey conducted for The Advertising Council and the Family Violence Prevention Fund, July – October 1996. 
7 Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003. 
8 Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003. 
9 U.S. Department of Justice, Violence by Intimates: Analysis of Data on Crimes by Current or Former Spouses, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends, March 1998. 
10 Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003. 
11 Bureau of Justice Statistics, Violence Against Women: Estimates from the Redesigned Survey, August 1995. 
12 Murray A. Straus and Richard J. Gelles, Physical Violence in American Families, 1990. 
13 Examining the Work of State Courts, 1995: A National Perspective from the Court Statistics Project. National Center for the State Courts, 1996.
 14 National Institute of Justice and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences ofViolence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, November 1998. 
15 Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003. 
16 Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003. 
17 National Crime Victimization Survey, 1992-96; Study of Injured Victims of Violence, 1994. 18 U.S. Department of Justice, Violence?Related Injuries Treated in Hospital Emergency Departments, August 1997. 
19 Jay G. Silverman, PhD; Anita Raj, PhD; Lorelei A. Mucci, MPH; and Jeanne E. Hathaway, MD, MPH, "Dating Violence Against Adolescent Girls and Associated Substance Use, Unhealthy Weight Control, Sexual Risk Behavior, Pregnancy, and Suicidality," Journal of the American Medical Association, Vol. 286, No. 5, 2001. 20 The Commonwealth Fund Survey of the Health of Adolescent Girls, November 1997.
21 Children Now/Kaiser Permanente poll, December 1995. 
22 U.S. Department of Education, Violence and Discipline Problems in U.S. Public Schools: 1996-1997. 
23 Strauss, Murray A, Gelles, Richard J., and Smith, Christine. 1990. Physical Violence in American Families; Risk Factors and Adaptations to Violence in 8,145 Families. New Brunswick: Transaction Publishers. 
24 U.S. Department of Justice, Violence by Intimates: Analysis of Data on Crimes by Current or Former Spouses, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends, March 1998.
 25 Carlson, Bonnie E. (1984). Children's observations of interpersonal violence. Pp. 147-167 in A.R. Roberts (Ed.) Batteredwomen and their families (pp. 147-167). NY: Springer. Straus, M.A. (1992). Children as witnesses to marital violence: A risk factor for lifelong problems among a nationally representative sample of American men and women. Report of the Twenty-Third Ross Roundtable. Columbus, OH: Ross Laboratories. 
26 U.S. Department of Justice, Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, November 1998. 
27 The Commonwealth Fund, Health Concerns Across a Woman’s Lifespan: 1998 Survey of Women’s Health, May 1999. 
28 National Institute of Justice and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention,, Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences ofViolence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, November 1998. 
29 Bureau of Justice Statistics Special Report, Reporting Crime to the Police, 1992-2000, March 2003. 
30 Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003. 
31 Bureau of Justice Statistics Special Report, Reporting Crime to the Police, 1992-2000, March 2003. 
32 Center for Policy Research, Stalking in America, July 1997. 
33 Center for Policy Research, Stalking in America, July 1997. Home Office 383 Rhode Island Street, Suite 304 San Francisco, CA 94103-5133 P 415.252.8900 F 415.252.8991 Washington Office 1522 K Street, NWSuite 550 Washington, DC 20005-1202 P 202.682.1212 F 202.682.4662 Boston Office 67 Newbury Street Mezzanine Level Boston, MA 02116 P 617.262.5900 F 617.262.5901 General Information E TTY 800.595.4TTYOrder MaterialsP 415.252.8089

17 December 2008

What, Me Worry?

We've got nutjobs moving to call a Constitutional Convention;  we've got the Office of the Resident-Select, most notably Chief of Staff Rahm Emmanuel (who could take some tips from Dick Cheney on the art of urban concealment), embroiled in a pay to play scheme involving the soon to be former Senate Seat of Commander Waffalo Backtrack...superb; we've got a new terrorist surge most recently manifested in Mumbai...thrillsville; the UN is considering stepping in to quell the Somali Pirate Problem (this may have to do with a shortage of eye patches and peg legs...the UN is so spotty about these sorts of things, though they do specialize in props...most notably sending unarmed soldiers to do nothing while people die); the Iranians are moving ever closer to being able to nuke Israel, and supply weapons grade uranium to whomever they wish...awesome...Vladimir Putin is having spasms in his trigger finger...happy happy joy joy; and here at home our economy is still imploding, while the federal government continues to magically pull more tax dollars out of our collective ass.  But am I worried?  Hell no!  Why?  'Cause we got this guy movin' in to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

So what if we're screwed?  We've got MAD!

16 December 2008


Just when you thought Pampers was going to get away with it, GLOBE breaks the story WIDE OPEN!  It took the National Enquirer to break the Edwards Can't Keep It In His Pants story, looks like gossip rags are scooping the MSM again! 


And I'm going to vomit...AGAIN!!!

Hope and Change Got No Home on the Range

Add the environmentalist camp to the growing list of those waking from the Pampers kool-aid with the announcement that the Resident-Select is planning on naming Ken Salazar as Secretary of the Interior.  Apparently 15o environmental groups signed a letter to Pampers urging him to nominate Democrat Congressman Raul Grijalva to the post, seeing him as a strong advocate for protection of public lands, and endangered species.  These groups are less than hot about Pampers' Salazar pick.

Kieran Suckling, from the Center for Biological Diversity in Tuscon, is quoted on National Pampers Radio's "All Things Considered" as saying, 
"Ken Salazar is very closely tied to ranching and mining and very traditional, old-time, Western, extraction industries. We were promised that an Obama presidency would bring change."
Once again, we tried to warn you dingdongs, but did you listen?  Noooooo.  Any guesses on which pooch is gonna get screwed next?

15 December 2008

The Party

Well, my House Party for Change was a rousing success.  I changed my undies, a lightbulb, water into wine, and a tire.  Then I passed out bricks for people to smash against their heads while croonin'.   "Only make believe that you love meeeeeeeee......"

The One Won Didn't He?

That's what I thought I saw on TV.  And yet the fraud who would be king still seems to be campaigning, still trying to get everyone to love him.  How else to you explain the culty/fascist call from David Plouffe for worshipers of the exalted Pampers to have "house parties for change" today?  Why is Joe Biden, when there is still plenty of dough in the Pampers war chest, sending out solicitations to get people to help pay down Senator Clinton's debt?  Why is an email being sent in the name of Bill Clinton?  Why are Hillary supporters being barraged with sweet little notes in their inboxes?  Why?  I can think of a few reasons.

The most obvious is that Pampers has an unquenchable need to be loved by everyone.  He tells everyone what they want to hear.  AIPAC can be told Israel will never be divided.  The next day, disgruntled Arab leaders can be told that's not what he meant.  What does Barry care as long as he's loved.

Another reason for this culty/changey nonsense is that there is a growing trend of people either losing interest, becoming disillusioned with, or caring not one wit for The One, now that he's actually won the election.  We saw a similar pattern after the primaries.  When the brownshirts no longer had Hillary to vilify their interest waned.  Sure there was a little pickup once the conventions were over, but clearly the summer of flipflopping cut into the the Lefty/Changey rah rah zisboombah. 

Now there is no opposition, the cabinet and administration is quickly filling up with former Clintonistas, the economy is continuing to tank, there is a new terrorist threat manifesting itself in the attacks in Mumbai, and the list goes on.

From Election Day +1 Pampers has still been trying to sell us on the fact that he can be the President.  He's still marketing himself.  We see it with that ridiculous, "Office of the President-elect" placard on his podium, complete with mini-Obidential seal (the most ludicrous thing he's done since they came out with that dumb seal in the first place).  And now we're seeing it with these solicitations from his people like Plouffe, basically saying, "Please don't stop loving the chosen one.  And those of you who haven't learned to love him yet, give him a shot.  He's really awesome!  I keep waiting for the message that says, "Love him or else."

I can't help but feel that the real story is that there aren't going to be very many of these so-called house parties for change.  I don't think any of his hardcore fans have one bit of interest in helping pay down Hillary's debt.  And guess what Camp Pamp?  You can send us as many emails as you want; those of us who opposed Pampers in the general election are not going to change our minds.  Is this campaign of the absurd supposed to distract us from the fact that The One has no legislative agenda, no foreign policy agenda, no plan for fixing the economy, and is facing a flock of lawsuits challenging his Constitutional eligibility to be President?  You managed to dupe 67 million people into voting for the little dictator.  What's the matter, buyer's remorse is setting in, or did you know this Blagogate mess was coming?

Quite frankly I'm surprised you're not just blaming all these problems on the Jews.  That always worked for the Czars.  Why not send an email out asking supporters to have "Pogroms for Change?"  Knowing you Pampers, and the thugs holding you up, it wouldn't surprise me if the Office of the Resident-Select already has that in the works.  Don't forget to blame the gays too.  You wouldn't want to leave them out.


14 December 2008

Just Another Reason to Vomit & Other Coincidences

My dear friend Heidi Li Feldman is collecting misogynist campaign garbage.  I too have inadvertently started collecting garbage.  My category is "the unbelievably ludicrous."

I had the honor of being favorably compared, by my aforementioned colleague, to Frederic Douglass, a man who stood up at the beginning of the American women's movement, as a reporter, and supporter of the fight for women's suffrage.  It was a humbling moment for me.  

Humility was not what I felt however when I saw this today on my internet walkabout:

No, you are not high on acid.  That is a baby bib with a side by side image of Frederic Douglass, and Pampers.  The quote is from Douglass: 
"I would unite with anybody to do right and with nobody to do wrong."
If there were to be a picture in the dictionary to accompany the definition of the word "irony" it would be this one.  It could also be used for the definition of "nauseating."  "Incongruous," "proposterous," "infelicitous," and "absurd," would also be acceptable.  

There is an entire line of products with this image if you are in need of an emergency vomiting.

Do I need to comment that if Frederic Douglass were alive to see the misogynist-select's campaign I suspect that he would not have endorsed Pampers?  Nah.  Too obvious.

I popped over to Seraphic Light last night to read the post on John Lennon, and suggested picking up Skywriting by Word of Mouth, remembering the puma references suddenly, and somewhat late.  Betty Blue, being an intrepid traveler, checked out the book and unsolicited by me in any way (no really, I didn't call her and give her a list of candidates I wanted to replace me in the Senate), commented on the puma references.

This nugget from the opening of "Puma Eats Coast Guard" makes my spleen percussive from laughter:
It was a large part of Max's orifices that had served him well during the recent "stagnation." An unqualified success was written all over him during a discourse on the probability of improbability. Max's hair had been a mess. Being a coast guard had its problems. Apart from the virtual isolation, the wind kept ruining his rod stewart. It had taken him six months, more or less, to look like an idiot, and more than fifty dollars (American). He was not too thrilled with the outcome.

Max could not distinguish between a vaginal spray and underarm deodorant. "The problem is," he used to moan, "I don't know which to spray first." These kind of things bore heavily on his mind. (What else did he have to think about just gazing out to sea?) Being very short sighted and easily led did not help matters. He could not even see the rarelyspotted Qualm, a beauty of a beast that lurks over Iceland. It lets out a bloodcurdling but stealthy stream of epitaphs whenever it is disturbed. Which isn't often.
The collective unconscious is always working...if you don't stop to blink every couple hundred once-in-a-whiles you'll miss it.

13 December 2008

Prometheus Unbound

So what is this bus, and what is its purpose? The bus in the banner is Furthur, a 1939 International Harvester that became the notorious acid test on wheels that Kesey and the Merry Pranksters sent careening across the country in the hopes of bringing the cultural revolution to the backwaters of America; “bringin’ on the party where they need it the most.” The original mission back in 1964 was to travel cross-country with large amounts of LSD kool-aid (can you imagine what this election would have been like if Pamperbots had been drinking that instead of the crap handed out by Camp Pamp?), the East Coast destination being New York, for the publishing party for "Sometimes a Great Notion."

The unbaptised hear the words “electric kool-aid acid test” and think of stoned hippies leaping from windows thinking they’re birds, or acid casualties roaming the streets, permanently zoned from one too many trips. But the Acid Tests were not about escaping, they were about burning things down, specifically the conformity of the 50’s, most notably represented by McCarthyism, a time of American fascism and fear (sound familiar?). Kesey was a government LSD test subject, perhaps the biggest mistake they ever made. Whoops! Who let this guy in? Robert Hunter, lyricist for the Grateful Dead, was also part of the study.  They told their associates they had to try this stuff. Well, the secret got out during a period when LSD was legal. Kesey understood the potential LSD held for unlocking the mind, and unlike the East Coast School, led by Timothy Leary, that sought to use the drug in controlled settings to help ease the mind into certain scenarios for the purpose of healing,and expanding consciousness, Kesey and the Pranksters espoused the notion that this was a vehicle for the releasing the unbridled mind; essentially the difference between looking in the mirror and smashing it.

The real aim for Kesey was not getting high, or getting other people high. It was the unshackling of the human soul and spirit. Only when one was able to step out of the culturally induced illusions of success, career, home life, and nationalism could one really be able to explore the full potential of the self, and learn to see the world from a place of pure freedom.  In many ways he was a modern Prometheus, and LSD was his fire.

The butterfly effect of that revolution is still rippling through our fabric. It even got to me as a suburban elementary school student in the 70's.  It was because of Kesey and the Pranksters that I discovered that my teachers were liars.  They tried to scare us away from drugs with ginormous lies like; one drop of pure LSD in the water system of a football stadium could kill everyone who drank from it. Unfortunately for them I knew that wasn’t true because I had heard of the Pranksters already (when rock ‘n’ roll is your hobby you hear stuff). I knew they ate the acid, and I knew they weren’t dead. Naturally the next logical step was to figure out what else the teachers were lying about.  Turned out it was a lot. I never trusted a word that came out of a teacher again; worst and best thing that ever happened…a lot like taking the red pill. That knowledge set me free, but it was not without its burdens. 

Can you imagine what it’s like to go to school day after day knowing that you cannot confirm or deny the things coming out of your teachers’ mouths? I would spend hours after school in the library cruising through microfilmed articles on anything from South American politics to astronomy, just to take in information that I felt I at least had some control over. I finally came to the conclusion that the only thing you can even begin to consider to be true is what you experience first hand. Any information you glean from an outside source could potentially be completely false. This blog that you’re reading right now might not even exist…or maybe I’ve put a widget in your brain…BOO!  It was difficult at times, but in the final analysis I wouldn’t change a thing. I learned to see the world in ways I otherwise would not have. I learned to trust my instincts and my intuition. In many respects those things are your most powerful weapons. Learn to trust yourself. We live among a great many liars.

Now don’t confuse me and think I’m saying you have to eat LSD in order to open your mind. Kesey and the Pranksters put on an Acid Test Graduation to mark the transition beyond consuming LSD. They used it to open the doors they needed to walk through and were ready to go back to the world no longer needing to consume it. If you allow yourself to understand that the world is not black and white, not what you think it is, and that you have to stab through the mask, as Melville might say, then you’re well on your way.  

I got to spend a little time with Carolyn Adams Garcia, Mountain Girl on the bus, back in the mid 90’s. It was a finishing of a circle for me. We talked about this and that. I got to thank her for all she and the rest of the Pranksters did for me; paving the way and breaking the ground that allowed me to liberate myself.  It was a revolution, and it’s not over yet.  In 2007 Garcia did an interview as part of the San Francisco Chronicle’s retrospective on the “Summer of Love.” She said something that pretty much sums it up for me, “I think that a lot of it is about having given ourselves permission to be weird. We gave ourselves permission. We also gave other people permission to be weird. Try to think outside of the box of convention. I think that's been terribly useful.”

If there was ever a time to give yourself permission to be weird, it’s now!

So what is the purpose of the Oh...My Valve Bus?  It's essentially the same; to encourage you to look at the world a little differently, expand the view, get your weird on, and share your gifts with the zombies because they're the reason we keep having to go through this crap again and again.

What's your acid test? What are you going to do to alter your perception of the world, expand your horizons, and set yourself free from the market forces selling America Hope and Change (ironically, the remaining members of the Grateful Dead, the house band for the acid tests, were completely bamboozled by Pampers)? What are you going to do to bring a little circus to the American scene?  What are you going to do to repair the world?

For those of you just starting to wake up here are some tips for the American journey that lies ahead:
  1. Nothing is what it seems.
  2. Everything has at least two meanings.
  3. Only believe what you experience, and then question it.
  4. Be as human as possible.  In other words, when faced with any situation, ask yourself, "What would Prometheus do?"
  5. Get in shape.  If you're going to do this journey right you're going to have to be in decent condition.
  6. Work to break the pattern of Kesey's Postulate: "In any given situation there are always going to be more dumb people than smart people."  You have to be one of the smart people.  Swell the ranks so that we can have more smart people in any given situation than dumb people.  How's that for a tipping point?
  7. Have fun and get your weird on!