Send In The Clowns

This past week was the Durban II conference on race. Where do we begin with this nonsense? Perhaps with the last international conference on race that took place in South Africa, where Israel was roundly condemned as a racist state.

Let's take a look at the declaration put forward by the NGO Forum at the 2001 conference.

Farticle 164 states:

...targeted victims of Israel's brand of apartheid and ethnic cleansing methods have been in particular children, women and refugees.

Farticle 425 calls for the implementation of:

a policy of complete and total isolation of Israel as an apartheid state...the imposition of mandatory and comprehensive sanctions and embargoes, the full cessation of all links (diplomatic, economic, social, aid, military cooperation and training) between all states and Israel.

Farticle 426, much like George W. Shrub's, You're either a terrorist or in league with the terrorists statement following 9/11, calls for:

condemnation of those states who are supporting, aiding and abetting the Israeli apartheid state and its perpetration of racist crimes against humanity including ethnic cleansing, acts of genocide.

Before going on it is important to note, once and for all, that the comparison of Israel to Apartheid South Africa is inherently false as all Arab citizens can vote and hold office, and have full civic equality under the law. Even Human Rights Watch has acknowledged that Arabs in Israel enjoy a far higher degree of civil liberties in a state with a Jewish majority than in virtually every Arab country. That's not to say that everything is sunshine, lollipops and rainbows between Arabs and Jews, but anyone who thinks it is remotely like South Africa was under Apartheid knows nothing about what living with Apartheid was about. For those people I suggest reading Cry the Beloved Country, or Donald Woods' books Biko, and South African Dispatches: Letters to My Countrymen as primers. The Struggle is my Life by Nelson Mandela is another. As far as the ethnic cleansing issue goes, Israel must just not be that good at it since, after all this time, those pesky Arabs are still around; even with all of the "help" Israel gets from the United States.

The tenor of the 2001 conference, in which Israel was singled out for special condemnation, cast a cloud over the 2009 conference which was set to reaffirm statements made in 2001. There were calls early on that the United States boycott the conference. The Resident withdrew the US delegation from the conference's planning sessions, but as late as the week before the conference he was leaning to attend (would he have bowed to President of Iran too?). He finally must have decided there was no way to attend the conference without blowing his FOI (Friend of Israel) cover. How brave. Though the final draft of this year's conference omitted any references to Israel, Zionism, or Middle East conflicts in general, the fact that a special guest was on the list of speakers cast another shadow on the conference.

Of all the nations participating in this years hypocrisyfest, only one head of state actually showed up; Iran's own megalomaniacal nebbish and schlemiel, Muhammed "I never miss an opportunity to have an opportunity to condemn Israel" Igogettajob. Apparently, Igogettajob's little tirade at the conference made quite a few people upset, causing them to walk out for the duration of the speech diatribe screed. Here are some of the little dictator's highlights:

"Governments must be encouraged and supported in their fights at eradicating this barbaric racism... Efforts must be made to put an end to Zionism."

Translation: no national self-determination for Jews. So while we're at it, let's also end national sovereignty for Persians. We are trying to end racism here after all. It's not as if Iran is committing acts of ethnic cleansing against its Arab population or anything...

Then there's this little gem where Igogettajob said Israel is a, "most cruel and oppressive, racist regime," which was created from the "pretext of Jewish suffering" during World War II.

Apart from his complete and total denial that there are gay Iranians, his hobbies include Holocaust denial and collecting Chia Pet Famous Dictators. If you believe that Israel was only created because of the Holocaust, the best way to delegitimate its existence is to deny that the Holocaust ever took place. Makes sense...if you're a psychopath.

As the rant got under way the entire French delegation walked out, along with 40 diplomats from more than twenty countries including Morocco.

Here's the list of nations whose delegations walked out:

Austria
Belgium
Britain
Bulgaria
Cyprus
Czech Republic (left the conference for good) ***
Denmark
Estonia
Finland
France
Greece
Hungary
Ireland
Latvia
Lithuania
Luxembourg
Malta
Portugal
Romania
Slovakia
Slovenia
Spain
Sweden

Morocco

St. Kitts and Nevis

Good on you.

***Thank you Czech Republic

UN Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon was none too pleased stating,

"I deplore the use of this platform by the Iranian president to accuse, divide and even incite. This is the opposite of what this conference seeks to achieve. This makes it significantly more difficult to build constructive solutions to the very real problem of racism".

Unfortunately, for Secretary Ban, he heads an organization whose history of Israel bashing is notorious. This is the same UN that hosts Palestine Day (We're Sorry That We Created Israel Day) on the anniversary of the day the UN voted to partition the land between the Mediterranean and the Jordan River into a Jewish state, and an Arab state. Usually a map of the land is present depicting Palestine, with no Israel. Usually not mentioned is the fact that the creation of the Arab state (which would have occupied more territory than the pre-1967 ceasefire lines), was rejected by the Arabs, with Israel invaded by Arab armies the following Spring. This is also the same UN that resolved in the seventies that Zionism is racism (a resolution that was repealed in the early nineties). So pardon me if I take Secretary Ban's words with a grain of salt.

But the highlight of the conference were the Jewish protestors who spoke out against Igogettajob, and the UN. The European Union of Jewish Students staged a protest against the UN's continued inaction over the genocide in Darfur. Inside the conference, members of the group donned rainbow clown wigs as Igogettajob was introduced, and threw their rubber noses at him as he began to speak yelling, "Racist! Racist!" The clown regalia was declared to be a statement that the conference was a sham and a circus, especially when a racist like Igogettajob is allowed to address a conference that is allegedly supposed to be against racism. The fact that so many nations walked out on the real clown is certainly a positive step forward, as is the EU's sound rejection of singling out of Israel in this year's declaration.

Stop reading this and go read the blog post by one of the members of the EUJS, Zach Novetsky, on his account of the events that day. This is what happens when thoughtful people stand up to be counted. Be inspired.

It is my hope that world Jewry adopts the throwing of clown noses as an expression of protest and anger, much like Arabs throw shoes as they did at the Shrub. I believe that rubber clown nose throwing should be adopted by all recalcitrant citizens when they encounter their leaders.

Next time the man who would be king comes to your town to zap the populace with his dopeymange TelePrompter 5000 gather your friends. Hide your rainbow clown wigs in your pants and keep the rubber noses handy. When he takes the stage let the wigs go on and the rubber noses fly. Is it a crime to throw a clown nose at a sitting Resident? If it isn't yet it probably will be, as it will most likely be declared illegal to wear a rainbow wig within 100 miles of anywhere he might be, including Air Force One fly-overs, which seem to happen rather a lot...

"Michelle, I'm thirsty. I think I'm gonna jump in Air Force One and get a slirpy in Norfolk."

"Shut up Barry I'm watching "Little House."

And now for something completely different...Projectiles...Projectiles...Projectiles