Buried In His Jammies...The Scoop On Egypt

So, while this blog has been taking a little break, I have been watching the events unfold in Egypt. Pundits are scratching their heads, the Idiot-in-Chief is well...being an idiot...and everyone is wondering what's going to happen over there.

This is not a very complex situation. Unfortunately, there are very few people in the news talking about this that have the foggiest notion as to how things really work in Egypt...or anywhere else for that matter. There were however a few moments of media justice, most notably being the attack on Christiane Almondpoo, whose poor quality of journalism is only surpassed by her loathing of all things Israeli. Anderson Pooper was punched in the head, and Katie Couric well, I think she was jostled. Please do not jostle Katie. We need those perky types to feed us our disinformation.

So what's the story with Egypt? As I said, it's unbelievably simple. The army runs Egypt. It always has, since the days of Gamal Abdel Nasser, who created the one-party system that brought Egypt its own brand of non-democratic democracy in 1956. A military man himself, who was sent to participate in the Egyptian delegation to negotiate a cease-fire with Israel in the wake of the Jewish state's surviving the Arab war of destruction brought against her, Nasser eliminated all other political parties in Egypt and consolidated his power with the military's backing.

Following the signing of the treaty between Israel and Egypt, the Egyptian military was facing massive stand-downs as its primary enemy was Israel. Facing layoffs and skyrocketing unemployment, the Egyptian military, one of the largest employers in Egypt, put its people to work in other areas of the Egyptian economy, tourism and such. A large portion of Egypt's economy is fueled by the military. Political and social instability is not simply bad for the country, it's bad for business, which is why you didn't see the army cracking skulls as we saw in Iran...killing your customer base is also bad for business.

So Mubarak resigns, and the military is running things...in other words, nothing has changed. While worthless Mohammed El-Baradei struts around like a rooster, he and the rest of the opposition leaders do not have to impress the people. They have to impress the generals. Whoever the army sees as being capable of keeping things stable will be to run in whatever elections there will be, and the winner will take power with the military's consent. That's it. It's that simple. Democracy...Egyptian style.

Of course the fly in the ointment is the Muslim Brotherhood, which Idiot-in-Chief says can be in the new Egyptian government if it rejects violence...which is the same thing he said about the MB's brothers in harm, Hamas. That really worked out well didn't it?

But just when you thought things couldn't get more obtuse, James Clapper steps into the vacuum. Head of U.S. Intelligence (which makes me wonder just how intelligent the rest of the bunch is), Clapper released a bit of brilliant analysis stating that the Muslim Brotherhood is "largely secular," and has "eschewed violence."

I'll wait for you to finish laughing hysterically...still waiting...okay, I'm going on whether you're ready or not.

So Jimmy, let me ask you this. Did you happen to notice that the Muslim Brotherhood's name only consists of two words? The second word, "Brotherhood," you and Idiot-in-Chief really like as it no doubt conjures up images of grown men holding hands and prancing through rainbow unicorn pastures in their underpants while singing "Do You Believe in Magic" by the Lovin' Spoonful, and of course cute little puppies.

The first word in the name "Muslim Brotherhood" is in fact the word, "Muslim." Nothing makes you say "largely secular" like the name of a religion in the title. Most likely what happened is he got so mushy over the notion of a brotherhood of Muslims that he thought the Muslim Brotherhood was the Muslim version of the YMCA.

In fact the Muslim Brotherhood has been killing since 1927, and sent commandos to fight the Jews in the War of Independence. And somehow James Crapper must have managed to block out this:

Sadat was assassinated following the issuing of a fatwa by Omar Abdel Rahman, leader of the Al-Gama'a al-Islamiyya, born out of the Muslim Brotherhood. Aren't you glad our intelligence services are being headed by such a grossly incompetent buffoon? At least this White House is consistent.

There is legitimate worry by those folks who are not so susceptible to this type of incompetent buffoonery that the Muslim Brotherhood could launch a takeover of whatever new government forms in the wake of Mubarak's resignation, which is why I would imagine that over the next several months it's members, along with those of its various offshoots, will be hunted down and will start quietly disappearing. Don't worry boys, the Egyptian military knows who and where you are. Get your affairs in order because you'll be moving in with the 72 virgins soon enough.

And to the Idiot-in-Chief, who clearly was not paying attention, and seldom does unless it relates to his jump shot or tee time, Egypt is not interested in what you want. The world doesn't care what you think. In the end you will get fooled again. And come the new elections in Egypt it will be meet the new boss, same as the old boss for you Egypt. Enjoy.

Everyone sing along with Pete.