A Carp Face Special For Lemon

This is for my blogging colleague, and sister in Red Sea Pedestrianness, Lemon (if you don't read her blog, you really should...she rocks!), who found herself with a tickled funny bone over my last post about our diplomatic nemesis George Carp Face Mitchell. Poor Carp Face. Poor poor Carp Face. After his successes in Ireland doing Guinness keg stands without vomiting, Carp Face set his sites on being the American that could successfully get Israel to commit suicide by surrendering the heartland of the Jewish people to the terrorist kleptocrats of "moderate" Fatah (They are moderate because they hang gays instead of throwing them off buildings like those heathens in Gaza, and use M-16s, knives, axes, and molotov cocktails to kill Jews instead of rockets).

But Carp Face just doesn't get any respect. Why Carp Face? Well, let us examine the empirical evidence.

Here is Carp Face vacationing in the tropics. After weeks of arm twisting and threatening Bibi with having to listen to Marack's "race speech" (also known as the "what racist preacher are you talking about?" speech) over and over until he converted, Carp Face took a well deserved break.

Here he is hiding from reporters from Arutz-7...

One thing you have to say about Carp Face is that he goes the extra mile for his country. Here is making love to an Asian diplomat in the hopes of gaining new dupes to secure American debt after the passing of the Stupulus package last year.

Though it's true that this incident ended with Carp Face leaving with a broken heart, you have to admire his stick-to-itiveness.

But perhaps his biggest let down was failing to get cast in the part of Admiral Ackbar in Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi...

Sorry man, you can't win 'em all. Maybe he should have pulled some moves on the couch at Skywalker Ranch.